A letter to my friends

Dear Friend,

Im sorry I haven't called you, that I haven't been around. You must feel that I've neglected you and I don't blame you at all for that. We used to meet for coffee, lunch, drinks and wander the shops together if we fancied it. I had time, life was slow, it was easy to say "lets meet up", "lets do something".

I can't explain my life to you, the days just whizz on by, it's constant chaos in my head, like shouting that you can't contain, can't stop and can't quieten down. I'm already thinking about next week, when am I here, when am I gone, who is taking E to nursery, will I ever get my hair done. It doesn't stop at night, I'm seeing spiders in the bed, catching clocks that aren't falling, putting a dummy in, taking a blanket off, what time do I leave for work in the morning? It's a huge jumble of everything right now and that includes you of course. I wonder what you're up to, are you happy, are you content, I wish that I had called you, or even sent a text, I'm sorry that I didn't but please know that I thought to.

I haven't forgotten about you and I do care about your day.

Some days you hear from me more than others, a gentle plea from a friend in need, please pop in if you can. My babies will be alone you see, not for one hour, one afternoon or even one day. They are alone and stuck in the house, this time for two days, next time maybe more. I know I haven't been there for you and you deserve so much more, but please don't leave me now. I hope you know that if you ever needed me I would be there, no questions asked, no matter how busy, I’d hide the body, I’ll drive you home, I’ll listen to your sorrows.. just call me, don't forget about me because I am here and I care.

I know things will settle and be easier to handle, we will go for lunch, for a drink or two, you watch, I promise, I’ll be back soon.